Or as a plaque in my grandfather’s office read: Don’t let the bastards grind you down. You can read more about the origin of the quote here. The funny thing about that is that I read that quote so many times through my childhood that I started to use it whenever people were in a bad spot, or a tough position. The earliest that I can remember using it was when I was 13 in my first band, and a friend was having trouble with his parents, and unable to make practice.

I don’t recall my father or my grandfather ever saying that quote to me, or around me, but I certainly remember that plaque that hung in my grandfather’s office. I would say that quote is as timely as ever now. It’s easier than ever to take a look around at unemployment, bankruptcies, home foreclosures, and think it’s someoneelse’s fault. Somebody else is to blame for my situation, or my predicament, but the only thing that we can control is ourselves, and to some extent our situation.

I believe that through attitude, and foresight we can create the trajectory for our life. If we want to be bummed out, rejected, and unhappy with what life gives us, we can, but we’re in charge of that. That’s not to say that this is about some kind of happy, happy, joy, joy affirmation perspective, but it is to say that if we want to ride the suck express, then all aboard, because there’s always room. However, it’s the hope train to tomorrow that’s going to get you off on the right foot and creating a trajectory that’s going to keep you moving forward towards life-enhancing opportunity and joy.

In fact, that’s one of the craziest things that I’ve noticed in life. When I start doing something, and I’m working at it, the endeavor takes on a life of its own. It becomes less about you and more about taking care of the thing that you’ve created. The first couple times I realized this it threw me, because I was on a trip and I wanted to get off. Sometimes, though, there’s no getting off. You have to ride the whole trip. Which, on the one hand, prevents you from beingwishy -washy with the things you build, but on the other hand a sort of synergy is created where the process of what you’re doing intersects with some kind of unseen energy, or current that just keeps flowing out from the thing you created.

The take-away is that if you want to put yourself on a positive life trajectory then be prepared to build something. Even through the tough times, don’t let the bastards grind you down, and eventually things will take off on their own.

We get opportunities,
however irregular
to make a difference.
Sometimes,
we’re able to step up
and take it on,
other times
life circumstances
are too much to bare
and we must stick with
what we’ve got
and where we’re at.
Life is a circuitous and
mysterious
journey will all kinds
of twists and turns,
experiences
and opportunities.
When your moment
comes,
will you be ready?

Success is based on appearance, not reality; I read this in Robert X. Cringley’s Accidental Empires and it was like a cosmic lightning strike to my being. I’ve always struggled with this, because success, so often, does in fact seem to be based on appearance rather than reality. The problem with appearances is that they yield nothing but a vision, a concept, an idea. But what do you do when the veneer of the appearance starts to crack? More work is required to keep up the appearance than to have done the thing that the appearance was created for or explained why it couldn’t be done and/or made other plans to begin with.

Appearance-based “success” that’s based on a tangible, is really what I’m talking about here, and to call this a success without any real tangible being delivered isn’t success at all. Successful relay of a vision, concept or idea, when the outcome is a tangible isn’t a success but rather a snow job dressed up as success. This is logic, though, however, and the human condition, through its very essence nullifies logic. So there it is. I’ve reconciled it, success is how things look not how thing are.

I’ll keep trying for success based on what is rather than the appearance, though…